Whats Good SWAGGG

/: Thinking of everything that made me miserable

My bestfriends death 4 years ago </3 I miss him so much My moms on vacation and I cant spend mothers day with her. one of the main things i never really told anyone but andy is over the summer last year when my grandma had a heartattack my parents said i could go with them to visit my grandma for a week because i had summer school but i said no because i wanted to stay for my ex and it hurts me so much that i picked a girl over my grandma and it wasnt even worth it I’m So sorry mama pancha im selfish i wish i could go back and see you one last time you Dago and my cousin edwin and grandpa i miss you guys soo much more then you can imagine guys im sorry the fact that i feel lonely idk what i feel im confused about the girl i really like right now but i dont want to pursue it because im just nervous im tired of fucking around i really am like im not even horny like that anymore i just want someone to just chill with and talk to but w.e and everynow and then i still think about my ex who i dont talk to anymore like just what if we worked it out but w.e i try not to care anymore and it works but i cant do that she meant to much but fuck it I gotta do what i gotta do to be happy and this one girl gets my mind off of everything but i dont want to make it awkward or anything I have been talking to her for  while now but ugh im to scared i mean i guess ill take the chance over the summer but shes really cute and gives me smile when i see her its been a while since i felt that you make me happy =) but another thing in the way is old feelings they sometimes get in the way but idky if they dont matter i hate being confused over a girl -,- ive been smoking almost every day since 4/20 which needs to stop i guess this will be my last week my nephew/godson may have something wrong with his head which is getting to me and i hope its nothing because honestly  both my nephews and niece are like my kids i adore them with anything and i will give my life for them even tho  i joke around with you guys to much i do it out of love honestly i dont even know who my friends are anymore my circle is falling apart /: and also i feel like complete shit i did something with the girl my cousin likes and i didnt mean to it just happen i didnt know he was crushing on her till the end of the night /: and i feel soo bad i told him he says its all good but  its not im turning into an asshole to somegirls i never really called girls bitches or referred to them as just a bitch or a pop but everything changed honestly idk well i gg I’m gonna go visit my bestfriend Dago i love you bro <3

Kinda annoyed blinks not going to Bamboozle reason being they are the only reason I spent 90 to go see them smh

Shesh my minds fucked up right now …